Good Friday!

I wish I could share everything with you all, I think if I did people would be moved in a profound way for this darling girl and her baby. However, I feel that for privacy sake, it’s not a good idea.

When we first got all the information about this situation it seemed much more grim then what the actually story ended at. We didn’t realize the level of support this girl had, or the level of doubts she had about adoption until the day before she went into labor. (Note that I was not talking directly to the mom at this point, only to the social worker, so it’s always a little more confusing in any case.) We are super open with our heart for adoption, and we want to help in any way we can, but if a girl feels she can parent (despite a crisis pregnancy), her family and friends want to support her, and they have the resources to do so, then it probably isn’t a situation that needs us. That’s basically this situation in a nutshell.

The positive is, with both Joel and I, we know we were respectful of this momma, we truly wanted to support her and her baby no matter what she chose, and there is nothing to regret in the sense that we are just us, doing what we love – supporting adoption because we believe in it. We only wish we could have had more information earlier so we could have known our place better. The worst feeling I’ve had in this is that I didn’t really know what this girl wanted, but because of that, I assumed that she needed our “help”. “Help” essentially being that we would “take” the baby she wanted to parent – possibly the most awkward feeling ever!

Once I learned that this mom had both the ability and the want to parent, my whole mom-side turned off toward the specific situation. The only real unfortunate part is that this all coincides with us running out of time on our home study and still never having had a viable adoption situation. We don’t qualify for most types of adoption. We have biological and adopted children. We’ve never experienced infertility (or even a miscarriage). We are young and not rich. We have full lives. Most birthparents want everything the opposite of us. It’s hard to think that we aren’t good enough for adoption when there have been few things as important to us in the past 10 years.

On the flip side, my dad had another surgery yesterday that we hope will give him some real relief, we get to see all our family on Sunday (our new nephew Dean is going to be subjected to both Joel and I aggressively fighting over him for the entire Easter holiday), and we stinking love the kids we have. If this is all life offers us, how dare we complain. As my mom says, “No one died, so that’s good.” (And how much does that say about our last year as a family?!)

Ironically, today is the day that we actually celebrate death – Good Friday. The day Someone did die making all this adoption stuff more then just a legal process and giving it a heavenly meaning for believers. Doesn’t that seem funny that I’m here today blogging this? I kinda can’t get over it. Much like I can’t get over sharing this song every Good Friday.

Come close listen to the story, about a love more faithful than the morning

The Father gave his only Son just to save us

The earth was shaking in the dark
All creation felt the Fathers broken heart
tears were filling heaven’s eyes
The day that true love died, the day that true love died
When blood and water hit the ground
Walls we couldn’t move came crashing down
We were free and made alive
The day that true love died, The day that true love died

Search your heart you know you can’t deny it
Come on, lose your life just so you can find it
The Father gave his only son just to save us

The earth was shaking in the dark
All creation felt the Fathers broken heart
tears were filling heaven’s eyes
The day that true love died, the day that true love died
When blood and water hit the ground
Walls we couldn’t move came crashing down
We were free and made alive
The day that true love died, The day that true love died

Now, Jesus is alive

Jesus is alive
Oh, He is alive
He rose again

When blood and water hit the ground
Walls we couldn’t move came crashing down
We were free and made alive
The day that true love died, The day that true love died

>>>><<<<

xxoo

Happy Resurrection! 

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